I read about the violence unfolding at UCLA where Pro-Palestinian protesters were violently attacked by a white masked group throwing fireworks, using chemicals and clubs. The irony was not lost on me. What do you call these people? It’s been widely communicated that the Pro-Palestinian protesters are anti-semitic by nature; so, what do we call this new violent group that attacked? Is this how “Israel has the right to defend itself” manifests itself? Did they take it upon themselves to go clear this “illegal settlement” on the UCLA campus? Again, the irony is not lost on me. This missed opportunity at trying to better understand each other has turned into just another shitshow.
Somewhere, somehow we’ve lost focus on the main issue of Israel unleashing the hounds of hell on Gaza resulting in countless and senseless civilian deaths and the Hamas attack on October 7th. Let’s not forget that the Hamas attack on October 7th drew cheers from extremists and didn’t receive the widespread condemnation and empathy that other terrorist attacks received in the past. There was no “Je Suis Charlie” where everyone applied a French flag filter over their Facebook profile pictures after the Charlie Hebdo attacks. There was no time to heal from this senseless attack. Hostages were taken adding a new dimension to this conflict. The Hamas attack on October 7th was different. This attack brought out congratulatory press releases from every hate group imaginable. “From the river to the sea Palestine will be free!” became the rallying cry for these idiots.
In light of this all, students across the US started gathering in protest. The occupation of college campuses didn’t happen until ~200 days into the conflict and after all attempts at a ceasefire have failed. According to the UN, At least 34,568 Palestinians have been killed and 77,765 wounded in Israeli attacks on Gaza since October 7th. What was this masked group trying to accomplish by attacking the Pro Palestine group? This chaos went on for three hours until the cops intervened. Witnesses described how security personnel barricaded themselves inside buildings.
Supercommunicators
I wish we would’ve developed a bomb by now that we could drop on Israel and Gaza that gives everyone a deep tissue massage and lavender aromatherapy and plays the sounds of whales in the ocean or gentle raindrops of a quiet storm. Then, we can get everyone in a room to gently discuss their issues and find a solution that works for everyone. I’m currently reading Supercommunicators: How to Unlock the Secret Language of Connection by Charles Duhigg. I think taking a few lessons from this book could really help the situation going on across college campuses. In my mind, the first essential question of “What’s this really about?” has yet to be negotiated. That’s the crux of Aristotle’s pathos and logos. It’s about understanding and being understood. I don’t know how they will ever get there with all this raw emotion and noise.
Cheeseburgers In Paradse
People only see Pro-Palestine and Pro-Israel and if you’re one of them, you naturally have to be against the other. Using this as your starting point is completely ridiculous. The fact that I like eating cheeseburgers does not mean that I am automatically against vegetarians. If vegetarians start calling me a murderer and all sorts of other stuff for eating cheeseburgers, I’m probably going tell them to Fuck Off and go on living my life. I don’t need other offended cheeseburger lovers to come to my defense. However, there’s always going to be one radical cheeseburger lover that’s going to find some other disgruntled cheeseburger lovers to join their crusade against the vegetarians.
Ever since veggie burgers became a thing and crossed over into their burger territory they have been vigilant against any further aggressions or giving up any more territory. There may be some disagreement within the cheeseburger lovers over what kind of condiments and cheese is the best to put on a cheeseburger; but, they all are united in their hatred of vegetarians and they all agree that a cheeseburger needs a bun (sesame or plain), a burger (100% all beef), and cheese (cheddar, american, swiss, etc.).Now that they’ve established their cheeseburger charter, the cheeseburger lovers takes it upon themselves to attack the vegetarians on behalf of everyone that has ever eaten a cheeseburger and beat the shit out of those vegetarians.
While the cheeseburger lovers were out for blood and reigning terror on the vegetarians, McDonald’s (377 billion burgers sold to date) made a monstrosity called the Greek Mac. A Frankenstein of a burger wrapped in a pita and topped with tzatziki while the cheeseburger lovers were distracted by the vegetarians. If the cheeseburger lovers truly loved cheeseburgers, they would have never let McDonald’s get away with this. Instead of fighting the real enemy (McDonald’s), the cheeseburger lovers double down on the vegetarians and lay siege to the vegetarian encampment.
After all this insanity, a cheeseburger will never taste the same for any cheeseburger lover. Naturally, they’ll all have to become vegetarians like the eponymous Jimmy Buffet song about a man who “is trying to amend his carnivorous habits” with health food such as sunflower seeds. In the final analysis, he can’t get over loving him a cheeseburger. I know this is all one big metaphor for the current conflict, but I can’t help myself considering how this is all happening at an institution for Higher Learning and can only be explained in a way that a 3rd grader can understand what’s going on. I’ve eaten a cheeseburger at the same table with with a vegetarian that ordered a veggie burger. Guess what? We shared dessert.
Cheeseburger in paradise (paradise)
Jimmy Buffet
Medium rare with Muenster’d be nice (paradise)
Heaven on earth with an onion slice (paradise)
I’m just a cheeseburger in paradise
Leave a Reply